Monday, April 6, 2009
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
10 ways to survive your 9-5 Job
How many of us work a 9-5 that they are bored to death. Some of may work jobs that require us to come to work whenever they choose. But this for the office desk worker with no cubicle or wall hiding them, security officers, any front desk staff, supermarket clerks, stockroom people, custodians, anything that deal with you starring at the samething for 8hours!! These rules I will lay before have helped me and several other. You must swear to privacy upon this blog and never let your boss see this, and if you are a boss don't be a dick about it please!!
1) 4 bathroom breaks!! Now it not about just using the bathroom it how you do it and must be split up right or you will lose. The time limits for each 5min, 5min, 20min, then the 30min one. How you use them use them wisely! This could kill major time.
2) Walk around with paper. Their nothing that makes you look busy then walkin around with a piece of paper with writing on it. No one can tell your bullshitting(but you are) but if you look busy in the face walkin back and fourth with a piece of paper you can waste 20min up to a hour of time.
3)Throw away garbage even if it not yours. Look around your job area you can always find garbage. Pick it up make yourself look productive and working. Just walk around picking up shit as long as it leads you away from work and kill time. Time estimate all day thing.
4) Text messaging on the low!!
This rule is dangerous but kills time, but still dangerous if you don't know how to do it. All day thing!!
5) Lunch Runs. People are always hungry. Always when you step ask anyone especially your boss if he or she want something. Their greedy asses will say yes even if they are full they will ask for something a apple coffee or newspaper. Whatever they want make sure they know it far from work. This is a 20min task.
If u haven't got fired yet you are doing great okay here we go!!
6) Phone calls. Act is if your making job related calls but call an entertaining friend who doesn't bore you this can kill 30min at a time.
7) Find a closet stairwell or go back to bathroom!! Hide in their and count the spots on the floor. This will only kill 2min. Why because you may think your killing time but it in your head!
8) Puzzles in the newspaper. Depending how much patience you have it can kill 5mins.
9) Gossip with co-worker. Nothing kills time than listening to your co-worker gossip about people you work with. But becareful not to share your buisness. Depending on gossiper this can last all day.
10) Last and not least read all my blogs, get caught and not care!!! Or just do your damn job
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!
1) 4 bathroom breaks!! Now it not about just using the bathroom it how you do it and must be split up right or you will lose. The time limits for each 5min, 5min, 20min, then the 30min one. How you use them use them wisely! This could kill major time.
2) Walk around with paper. Their nothing that makes you look busy then walkin around with a piece of paper with writing on it. No one can tell your bullshitting(but you are) but if you look busy in the face walkin back and fourth with a piece of paper you can waste 20min up to a hour of time.
3)Throw away garbage even if it not yours. Look around your job area you can always find garbage. Pick it up make yourself look productive and working. Just walk around picking up shit as long as it leads you away from work and kill time. Time estimate all day thing.
4) Text messaging on the low!!
This rule is dangerous but kills time, but still dangerous if you don't know how to do it. All day thing!!
5) Lunch Runs. People are always hungry. Always when you step ask anyone especially your boss if he or she want something. Their greedy asses will say yes even if they are full they will ask for something a apple coffee or newspaper. Whatever they want make sure they know it far from work. This is a 20min task.
If u haven't got fired yet you are doing great okay here we go!!
6) Phone calls. Act is if your making job related calls but call an entertaining friend who doesn't bore you this can kill 30min at a time.
7) Find a closet stairwell or go back to bathroom!! Hide in their and count the spots on the floor. This will only kill 2min. Why because you may think your killing time but it in your head!
8) Puzzles in the newspaper. Depending how much patience you have it can kill 5mins.
9) Gossip with co-worker. Nothing kills time than listening to your co-worker gossip about people you work with. But becareful not to share your buisness. Depending on gossiper this can last all day.
10) Last and not least read all my blogs, get caught and not care!!! Or just do your damn job
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!
Harlem World is a FairyTALE
As a child some of us that were fortunate to believe that their was a Santa Clause, Easter bunny, Tooth fairy, even that their was a reindeer running around with a huge stop light on his face. But as we got older things came to unravil. That was daddy eating the christmas cookies, or rabbits aren't that fuckin tall, and everytime I asked that fat bastard for sum real shit I'd get a train set!!!
I use to be a huge Mase fan when I was in highschool. He use to rap about tales of a place called Harlem World. He told stories about money flying out of the sky. He told stories of beautiful glittery women dancing on the streets. Puff Daddy was another storyteller!! He told similiar stories of people harlem shaking in the streets. Colorful streets, people happy dacing, face painting,shit you would think they were serving cotton candy 24/7!!! They both made me believe this place was a real sesame street. They made me believe money flew out the sky!!! I believed these muthafuckers!!!
I went to Harlem World and boy was in for a real big suprise. First of all its not even a world it not even a damn borough!!! See when u ask a local ignorant NewYorker were are they from you will probably hear Harlem, Queens Bridge, Brownsville or Brook-lawn(shaking my head) the X and rickers island!!! No one knows well most do Harlem is located in Manhattan and is just a area location. That was the first lie!!
Second were was the Harlem shakers, Their were none just crackheads!!! They appeared to be dancing but they were itching for more drugs that piece of Micheal Phelp swimming through their veins!! Instead of money flyin out of the sky, I saw stick up kids emptying people pockets for their hard earned money!!! I want up their with my shiny suit all ready to join the festivities and the only one dressed like me was a old as pimp stuck in the Kurtis blow era!! As matter fact my shiny suit was yellow just like in the video and cops gave me a ticket for unproper use of high beams, then I almost got my suit taken from a hatian voodoo princess because she thought I was some type of sun god. I was like what have these people done to Mase's Harlem world. I screamed Mase!!!!!!!. Then everyone stopped and looked at me with anger in their face. These people don't even like mase as one person threw a brick my way!!! "You and Mase go fuck yourself" they said.
Harlem World doesn't exist I can't believe this shit Why why whyyyyyyyyyy. Mase almost got me killed then I though I saw the dancing women and they were prostitutes, hookers, jezebels, tramps!!!!
Never again will I believe rap again!!!
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!
I use to be a huge Mase fan when I was in highschool. He use to rap about tales of a place called Harlem World. He told stories about money flying out of the sky. He told stories of beautiful glittery women dancing on the streets. Puff Daddy was another storyteller!! He told similiar stories of people harlem shaking in the streets. Colorful streets, people happy dacing, face painting,shit you would think they were serving cotton candy 24/7!!! They both made me believe this place was a real sesame street. They made me believe money flew out the sky!!! I believed these muthafuckers!!!
I went to Harlem World and boy was in for a real big suprise. First of all its not even a world it not even a damn borough!!! See when u ask a local ignorant NewYorker were are they from you will probably hear Harlem, Queens Bridge, Brownsville or Brook-lawn(shaking my head) the X and rickers island!!! No one knows well most do Harlem is located in Manhattan and is just a area location. That was the first lie!!
Second were was the Harlem shakers, Their were none just crackheads!!! They appeared to be dancing but they were itching for more drugs that piece of Micheal Phelp swimming through their veins!! Instead of money flyin out of the sky, I saw stick up kids emptying people pockets for their hard earned money!!! I want up their with my shiny suit all ready to join the festivities and the only one dressed like me was a old as pimp stuck in the Kurtis blow era!! As matter fact my shiny suit was yellow just like in the video and cops gave me a ticket for unproper use of high beams, then I almost got my suit taken from a hatian voodoo princess because she thought I was some type of sun god. I was like what have these people done to Mase's Harlem world. I screamed Mase!!!!!!!. Then everyone stopped and looked at me with anger in their face. These people don't even like mase as one person threw a brick my way!!! "You and Mase go fuck yourself" they said.
Harlem World doesn't exist I can't believe this shit Why why whyyyyyyyyyy. Mase almost got me killed then I though I saw the dancing women and they were prostitutes, hookers, jezebels, tramps!!!!
Never again will I believe rap again!!!
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
I BELIEVE NICK HOLLYWood is COmedy CAMPAIN
IF I CAN MAKE 2 PEOPLE LAUGH...THEN I HAVE MADE 20 LAUGH IF I MAKE 20 PEOPLE LAUGH THEN I HAVE MADE 100 LAUGH,AND IF I MAKE 100 LAUGH THEN I HAVE THE WORLD!! THIS IS MORE THAN JUST THE MONEY AND MANGOES FOR ME IT BOUT THE COMEDY THE FAME AND O YEAH THE LOVE....BUT SHIT NOT TO CONTRADICT MYSELF IT ALSO BOUT THE MONEY......SOMETHING ABOUT MAKING PEOPLE LAUGH OR A SMILE ON THEIR FACE GETS ME HIGH ALONE N I STRIVE TO DO NEW AND MORE EVERY DAY HEY I SELL MANGOES EVERY 7OCLOCK IN THE MORNING ON THE VANWYCK......I LOOK UP IN THE SKY N WISH AND WONDER WHATS NEW OVER THAT GREAT WALL OF CHINA ....DOES THEIR CHICKEN AND BROCCOLI TASTE THE SAME AS THE ONE IN THE HOOD?...ILL NEVER KNOW TILL I MAKE IT!!
( Blog in 04)
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!!
( Blog in 04)
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!!
TRUE GHETTO STORY
The other I was listening to some throw back music by Alicia keys while feeding my giga pet. Yes I still own one, mine never died because I take care of it. Anyway I was listen to her song true life ghetto story and I was like hey why not tell mine. I can't afford the jamaican she had on her track to help me so after you read each line just say Bumbaclot!! Ok here we go!!
My story!! Here my true ghetto storyyyyyyyyyyyy!!
I SEE GREEN BENCHES ACL BROKEN AND POTENTIAL CRACK LORDS, UPPIDY HOES WORKING AT WHITE CASTLES FIENDING 4 THAT PAY CHECK TO WAIT ALL NIGHT AND MORNING FOR THE NEW JORDANS, NEXTEL CHIRPING AND THEIR FRIENDS ARE RIGHT NEXT TO THEM,RING TONE WARS, BEEF THRU AOL MESSENGER IN CHAT ROOMS WITH PEOPLE THEY NEVER MET, PREGENANT WOMEN MODELING WITH THEIR SHIRT UP IN MUSIC VIDEOS, 9 YEAR OLD TAKING THE TRAIN AT 9CLOCK AT NIGHT, FLIGHT JACKETS BEING SOLD MORE THAN 30DOLLARS, EVERY BASKETBALL PLAYER AND RAPPER HAS A CLOTHING LINE WHAT THE FUCK HAPPPENED 2 THE CREATIVITY, GUM COST 30CENT, A SLICE IS NOW A $1.85 NEARLY 2DOLLARS HAVE TO PAY 5CENT EXTRA FOR A STRAW, GANG MEMBERS TRADING SIDES LIKE BASKETBALL CARDS, NO ONE SNITCHING ANYMORE INNOCENT CATS BEING RUNOVER, A ROTI SHOP ON EVERYCORNER TAKING OVER THE CHINAMAN HUSTLE,
THIS IS MY TRUE GHETTO STORY SAY YES THIS IS MY STORY!!!!
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!!
My story!! Here my true ghetto storyyyyyyyyyyyy!!
I SEE GREEN BENCHES ACL BROKEN AND POTENTIAL CRACK LORDS, UPPIDY HOES WORKING AT WHITE CASTLES FIENDING 4 THAT PAY CHECK TO WAIT ALL NIGHT AND MORNING FOR THE NEW JORDANS, NEXTEL CHIRPING AND THEIR FRIENDS ARE RIGHT NEXT TO THEM,RING TONE WARS, BEEF THRU AOL MESSENGER IN CHAT ROOMS WITH PEOPLE THEY NEVER MET, PREGENANT WOMEN MODELING WITH THEIR SHIRT UP IN MUSIC VIDEOS, 9 YEAR OLD TAKING THE TRAIN AT 9CLOCK AT NIGHT, FLIGHT JACKETS BEING SOLD MORE THAN 30DOLLARS, EVERY BASKETBALL PLAYER AND RAPPER HAS A CLOTHING LINE WHAT THE FUCK HAPPPENED 2 THE CREATIVITY, GUM COST 30CENT, A SLICE IS NOW A $1.85 NEARLY 2DOLLARS HAVE TO PAY 5CENT EXTRA FOR A STRAW, GANG MEMBERS TRADING SIDES LIKE BASKETBALL CARDS, NO ONE SNITCHING ANYMORE INNOCENT CATS BEING RUNOVER, A ROTI SHOP ON EVERYCORNER TAKING OVER THE CHINAMAN HUSTLE,
THIS IS MY TRUE GHETTO STORY SAY YES THIS IS MY STORY!!!!
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!!
SHE dont WANT YOu GO THAT WAY!!
My fellow male Americans sometime we are just misunderstood but are we? Time have changed when you can just walk up to a women and say hey may I have this dance? Or exscuse me you are very dashing what is your name? Can I have your number so we may talk? Hey can we go for a walk?
If u try this now in the Obama era.. You will get WhAt!!!, Get the fuck out of here!! I look beautiful your mother muthafucka!, here my number 1-800 get lost, You wanna walk, walk up your mother ass!!!
Yes sad but true!! See we can blame the female that the old fashioned way is gone. But hey we kinda mess it up by when a nice looking lady walks by we a) grab her arm and growl yo come here what's good for tonite!! B) At club we try to dance behind them with a erection harder than brimstone C) If we say hi and they don't reply. We may say " YO what the fuck, O you aint gonna say hi fuck you bitch U bitch slut slut slut!!!
Now some females may actually like that but those are the ones that listen to DMX!! Now I've done a study some men talk to girls for long periods of time think their going somewhere and are getting no where,and when I mean no where I mean like you tryin to find parkin on wall street No where!! Then when you find out, you end up watching re-runs of Hogan heroes or Sex in city not by accidnet but because your tryin to find answers. Well here's some tips that might let you know before hand she not interested!!
1) If the text messages go from hey how was your day or I miss you to just simple texts like.( Hey). (K). Or (smh). :( or. I guess or simply ............... She doesn't want you
2) If you only talk thru text and never received a call ever and you do call and she send you to voice mail and she texts you back and say I don't like speakin on phone but talks to others, cmon dog she has a phone so she can talk she can text on computer lol she doesn't want you!!!
3) If u tell her she looks good and she replys don't you have work to do ..... She doesn't want you.
4) Fellas if you do get the date and she goes on and on about how great all her ex boyfriends are during dinner and recieves $500 dollars gifts from him still and says we just friends she doesn't want you!!
5) If you ask her out on a date and she say no I'm busy but that same day goes to same place you wanted to go with her girlfriend ... She doesn't want you!!!
6) If u guys speak and she goes on and on about how all guys are dogsss all day .. Man just leave her alone!!
Now I may not have answered all of them but ladies and men please add on to the madness in the comments!!!
Remember this is all entertainment and these just are studies I have done no one specific I don't want any female spam thank you lol
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!!
If u try this now in the Obama era.. You will get WhAt!!!, Get the fuck out of here!! I look beautiful your mother muthafucka!, here my number 1-800 get lost, You wanna walk, walk up your mother ass!!!
Yes sad but true!! See we can blame the female that the old fashioned way is gone. But hey we kinda mess it up by when a nice looking lady walks by we a) grab her arm and growl yo come here what's good for tonite!! B) At club we try to dance behind them with a erection harder than brimstone C) If we say hi and they don't reply. We may say " YO what the fuck, O you aint gonna say hi fuck you bitch U bitch slut slut slut!!!
Now some females may actually like that but those are the ones that listen to DMX!! Now I've done a study some men talk to girls for long periods of time think their going somewhere and are getting no where,and when I mean no where I mean like you tryin to find parkin on wall street No where!! Then when you find out, you end up watching re-runs of Hogan heroes or Sex in city not by accidnet but because your tryin to find answers. Well here's some tips that might let you know before hand she not interested!!
1) If the text messages go from hey how was your day or I miss you to just simple texts like.( Hey). (K). Or (smh). :( or. I guess or simply ............... She doesn't want you
2) If you only talk thru text and never received a call ever and you do call and she send you to voice mail and she texts you back and say I don't like speakin on phone but talks to others, cmon dog she has a phone so she can talk she can text on computer lol she doesn't want you!!!
3) If u tell her she looks good and she replys don't you have work to do ..... She doesn't want you.
4) Fellas if you do get the date and she goes on and on about how great all her ex boyfriends are during dinner and recieves $500 dollars gifts from him still and says we just friends she doesn't want you!!
5) If you ask her out on a date and she say no I'm busy but that same day goes to same place you wanted to go with her girlfriend ... She doesn't want you!!!
6) If u guys speak and she goes on and on about how all guys are dogsss all day .. Man just leave her alone!!
Now I may not have answered all of them but ladies and men please add on to the madness in the comments!!!
Remember this is all entertainment and these just are studies I have done no one specific I don't want any female spam thank you lol
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!!
THE LATE NIGHT GAS
O SHIT I FARTED WHILE I WAS SLEEPIN DID SHE HEAR IT ? HOW MANY OF US HAVE CHILLED WITH A FEMALE GOT THE THAT CHANCE 2 SPEND THE NIGHT AT HER CRIB AND U ROLL OVER ON YOUR STOMACH GET REAL COMFARTBLE FORGET THAT U ATE ALOT OF MACARONI AND U KNOW DAMN WELL U BEEN HOLDING THAT SUPRISE ALL NIGHT ON YOUR STOMACH SO IT GOES AWAY U LAY THEIR FOR YOUR FIRST NIGHT NO MUSIC PLAYIN NO T.V ON U LAY ON YOUR STOMACHS SHE JUST HAPPENS TO LAY HER HEAD ON YOUR BACK NOW YOUR LOVIN IT YOU FALL ASLEEP U DONT EVEN KNOW IT NOT A SOUND IN THE HOUSE U CAN HEAR ONLY MAYBE HER SNORE IF SHE DOES ARE NOT THE ROOM IS SET 4 A VERY PLEASNT SLEEP AND SHE LOOKS SO PEACEFUL YOUR KNOCKED OUT WITH NOTHIN ON YOUR MIND AND BRWAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!U JUMP UP LIKE O SHIT THE FIRST THING U SAY IS DID SHE HEAR THAT SHE HAD 2 IT WOKE U UP YOU LOOK AT HER NOW SHE WAKES UP AND ASK U HEY WATS WRONG BUT SHE LOOKS GUILTY WHY MAYBE BECAUSE AN HOUR BEFORE U LET GO SHE HAD THE SAME EXPERIENCE!!!
(Blog done in 05)
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!!
(Blog done in 05)
Believe in Nick hollywood is comedy Campaign!!!
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